Don’t Say Whocares When You Really Cares

A discomfort sore struck me in my throat early in the morning when I woke up one Friday morning.  I proceed for work as usual.  Shortly, it bloomed to a full sore throat cum slight fever in the office.  It was damned cold and not able to cope with the extreme temperature.

I went to the toliet to escape the cold for a while.  When the clock reaches 6.30pm, i dash out to meet my friends.  Annie ask me to go back to rest after seeing my condition.  I gladly obliged.  Later, i went to see a doctor.  On my way, tears rolled out of my eyes, which I could not control.  Maybe my eyes were too feverish so it need to do so to cool down the temperature.  In actual fact, i thought of unhappy things.  Its been close to two mths and I finally broke down to this fever.  Its a sign for me to rest?  And recover from my heartbreak.   

This should be a very happy post, but I’m really not so.  The reason?  Its a long over-due promotion, which came one year later.  The comments he gave me is that I still need guidance and although I have a good attitude, he is not pleased wif my performance.  There is not much of an improvement for me last year.  None the less, I still got promoted, wif increments of like $100++.  Better than nothing lor…  at least it makes my resume looks good..  I can seek a better paid job else where faster. 

All my friends like seems to find new job already.. I still on the look out.  Now I understand why Jocelyn not happy with the promotion too, coz hers is long over-due too.  I need a breather..  I need more fresh air.. I need more new stuffs..  I need new environment.  I need… a new job… a new salary… new life.

Having been de-motivated for a year, I was finally promoted.  What does this mean?  More responsibilities? More work for me?  I really dun bother much.  Its not within my control.. I will have to find hard for things I want to achieve.

I know I need to discover new interests, other than just purely work, work and work.  I’m more blessed than other people, who are struck in lowly paid jobs and poor working environment. 

There is always room for better job advancement, its true.  That is the reason why I’m moving on.  I’m so decided to

Thank you, for giving me the strength to survive the hardships at work and the determination to overcome all odds, be it personal, or at work.

I must continue to stay positive!

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Here are my after thoughts watching "Hua Yang Shao Nan Shao Nu".

It is a very sweet and endearing show.  The male and female lead both like each other and dare not disclose the fact "rui xi" is a male in disguise.

The feeling of secretly liking each other &  Enjoying the feel of each other’s presence, is mutual.  The beauty of courtship already started before it commences - the "ambiguity" of not knowing it has started.  This is the most beautiful part of love.  Although it is a bit uncertain, but the sweetness is there to stay. 

It takes alot of guts to acknowledge it.  So, have our friendship changed?  Maybe yes, maybe no.  The element of sweetness is no longer there.  A dash of weirdness and "peace prevailing after storm" surfaces.  Do I still treasure our friendship?  Yes, definitely.  Hence, I should gradually forget about him rejecting me.  This is an un-intentional thought of losing a good friend.  Continue to have him as my friend ba….    You will still enjoy his company, if you still regard him as your friend. 

As a friend, the expectations are not too high.  He need not be a gentleman, he need not be attentive, he need not be to nice to you. 

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